Your Heart Always Knows
by Jinxter
Summary: SNOW KNOWS A conversation between Snow and Emma, set after 4x06. Pre-SwanQueen, discussion of Emma/Lily


Summary:

SNOW KNOWS

A conversation between Snow and Emma, set after 1x06.

Notes:

Inspired by the moment in 1x06 when Snow sees young Emma on the video, and a deep desire for more mother/daughter bonding in canon. It is my headcanon that Snow has always seen the way Emma and Regina look at each other, as Mary Margaret she kept quiet about it, initially when her memories returned she was in denial about it, but now, she just knows. The title quote, is of course, paraphrasing Lana Parrilla.

I don't have a beta so any mistakes are mine alone.

Emma heaved a sigh as she dropped her head back against the sofa and un-crossed and re-crossed her feet at the ankles as they rested on her mother's coffee table, trying to alleviate the numb spot on her heel. The apartment was quiet, Henry was asleep upstairs and although Charming had only just retired to bed, his soft snores could already be heard coming from the other side of the large room.

Explaining all they had managed to figure out about the Snow Queen had taken them late into the evening. Snow was tired as well, but baby Neal was grizzly and wouldn't settle unless he was draped on top of his mother, his tiny ear against her chest, listening to her familiar heartbeat. Snow's hand rubbed tiny circles on his back, her breath stirring the wisps of downy hair on the top of his head.

Rolling her head to the side she cast her gaze over her daughter, so grown up, so brave and good hearted. Sometimes she missed the ease with which they conversed under the curse though, when Emma would open up just a little more with her friend Mary Margaret than she does now, knowing her once friend is actually her mother. She is still protecting herself from Snow, and Snow is trying to learn to let go of her own wants and expectations of her child, and to treat Emma like the independent woman that she is. She longs for their closeness to return, though, and she can't help herself from trying to coax it out from wherever it went those few years ago.

"I can't even begin to tell you how good it was to see you on that video this morning." Snow smiled wistfully. The joy in her young daughter's eyes as she pulled faces into the camera with her – with Lily. The beautiful, dark-haired, dark-eyed, smiling girl, who had immediately reminded Snow so much of the girl who had rescued her as a child. She hadn't intended for the group to see that part, but had re-wound the tape a little too far when a second viewing was requested.

Emma groaned. "You did begin, as soon as you saw it, and you've continued all evening."

"It's hard for me to imagine your life, Emma. It was so different to anything I've known, and I want to know it, so it helped me to understand it just a little bit more."

She watched as her daughter's jaw tightened, bracing for the apology that Snow usually offered for sending her away, the apology that would shut down further conversation. This time, she wouldn't give it, as much as she longed to.

"You looked so happy with Lily. In my mind I know you had a really hard time growing up, but to see you have good moments too... well, you two were so adorable together. It made me so happy."

She cast a glance to her daughter, the tension in her jaw had dropped, replaced by a sadness in her eyes though, as they watched her own fingers pick imaginary lint from her jeans. She hated seeing sadness in others, especially Emma, so she tried to redirect the conversation from heading in a direction that she expected would only result in her baby girl closing off from her yet again.

"Did I tell you about what Will said to me when I found him digging on the beach?" She asked as light-heartedly as she could. The blonde rolled her head to face her, their matching green eyes locking for a moment.

"When you _accidentally_ pardoned him, you mean?" Emma tried to sound annoyed, but her heart wasn't in it and the teasing nature of her comment peeked through. Relief washed her face, glad for the distraction.

"Yes, Emma, when I _accidentally _pardoned him." Snow rolled her eyes, her hand unconsciously moving up to softly stroke her baby's head before returning to his back. She smiled at Emma. "When I said I was married to the sheriff, he thought I meant you."

Emma's head lifted up off the sofa and her eyebrows rose up before dropping into a frown. "Me?" She asked, a fraction too loud. "Why would he assume you were married to me? He met David."

Snow shrugged with one shoulder. "I don't know. He just kind of cocked his head to the side and said _Y__ou're married to the blonde?_" Her imitation of his accent was comically off-base.

Her daughter's feet were lifted off the table and placed flat on the floor as she leaned forward in her seat. "He even saw me and Hook on our date." She bit her lower lip, frown deepening. "He teased Hook that morning about trying to use Henry to get in my good books. Why would he think you and I were married?"

"Honey, don't worry about it. You probably just made such an impression on him that he just forgot that David was Sheriff too." Snow was starting to get a little concerned with how serious Emma was taking the insinuation, but her assurance seemed to help and Emma settled back into the sofa a little more comfortably.

The blonde crossed her arms. "What did you say to him?"

"I just said that no, you were my daughter, and that I meant the other Sheriff. He still seemed a little confused but now that I think about it that might be because no one explained to him how I can be your mother when you and I are the same age." Her lips pressed together and her eyebrows pulled together, thinking about the new arrivals that came with the second curse, wondering if their displacement into this world without the false identities provided during Regina's curse should be addressed, maybe as Mayor she needed to set up some kind of training assistance to help them settle into this world.

Emma tipped her head to the side, interrupting her mother's thoughts. "I'm older. Biologically." She pinched her lower lip between her teeth, staring at the empty mug on the coffee table, flecks of cinnamon still stuck to the rim. "Was that all you said?"

The brunette swallowed and felt her heart flutter, hoping she could find the right words. "Basically. I didn't think it my place to make any comment on your sexuality, that's for you to determine, and share if or when you want to." As much as she wanted to watch Emma's every move, she instead watched her baby boy's chest rise and fall as he slept, keeping her daughter only in her peripheral vision. It took an incredible amount of strength to let the conversation hang there, but she sensed that she needed to.

The women sat quietly, watching the flickering of the candlelight against the wall, breathing the gentle scent of vanilla emanating into the room from it.

Emma finally broke the silence. "If you want to come by the station in the morning, you can have a look through the file the Snow Queen kept on me."

Her mother turned to her, smiling brightly. "I would love to see it."

The silence returned, yet neither woman showed any desire to move. Emma closed her eyes, her head again rested back on the sofa, her breathing slow and her face blank. Snow concentrated on the warmth of her son on her chest, and the warmth in her chest from the closeness of her daughter.

After a while she began to wonder if Emma had fallen asleep, she smiled and decided to leave her, at least until Neal stirred.

Her quiet voice, a little croaky, wavering uncertainly, surprised her mother. "I loved her."

Keeping her eyes on the wall, Snow responded. "Who?" The flow of conversation seemed to indicate she meant the Snow Queen, but the emotion in her voice came from a place that Emma felt. That she remembered. But she wouldn't assume.

"Lily." Emma's eyes remained closed, and Snow didn't see the tear trace a line from the corner of one into her hair.

"Oh." This time Snow had actually to bite her tongue to not say more, and instead let Emma talk at her own pace.

The blonde drew a deep breath in through her nose. "I only knew her for a day, but I thought... I felt..."

"Sometimes you just know. In that moment when your eyes meet, you can feel it in your heart, drawing you together." She looked across to her daughter, whose eyes were open now and staring at the ceiling. The pieces were coming together. She knew she'd not seen the joy she saw in that video in her daughter's heart before her date with Hook. She hadn't seen her daughter light up at all around Hook. Not the way she had with Lily. Not they way she did... well, she wouldn't assume.

She would have to restrain herself from meddling if she were to have any hope of re-building a close relationship with her baby girl. Skittish like a young foal.

"Follow your heart, Emma. It always knows. You deserve a happy ending."

The blonde gave her a small smile, stood, and paused before leaning over her to kiss her brother on the side of his tiny head. She leaned back, then in again to kiss her mother on the side of her head too. "Goodnight, Mom."

Emma hadn't even reached the top of the stairs before Snow's tears dripped off her cheeks, splattering onto her already baby-stained top. Her heart ached, both swelling with happiness at feeling closer to Emma than ever before, and clenching knowing that the path to true love is never easy. But if there is one thing that Snow White has an abundance of, it is hope.


End file.
